Me too!
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize