How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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