Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Randomize
