But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
