Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Randomize
