why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
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