we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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