kristin has been a bad kristin
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
Randomize
