yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
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