I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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