im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize