Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
