i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.
Can I eat your pillow?
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
