so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
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