Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize
