Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
Randomize
