its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Randomize