Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Randomize
