Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's no shave November. This is our time.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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