Swine flu. Run for my life!
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
So I just went to clothing optional bar
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
