I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize