the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
