the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize