shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
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