i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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