i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Drunk walkin through police station. America
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
