i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
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