Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Randomize