I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
