Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
We have so much sex to catch up on
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
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