is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
i now understand why vodka
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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