Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
