I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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