I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
