so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
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