Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
