I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
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