i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
Randomize
