Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
false alarm. still invincible.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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