kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
birth control should be required to get into college
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
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