Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
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