Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
she peed on how many people?
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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