So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
