great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
then they caught me trying to hide the turtle in the fridge
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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