I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
