i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Randomize
