What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize