I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize