No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
