She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
