if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
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