that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
i want to swaddle you in tequila
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Randomize
